I'm on the naughty list

Well, at least when it comes to being pregnant. I've definitely done my fair share of the "don'ts" that I'd seen on the list that was given to me, woops! Granted, a lot of it is simply due to my lack of will power and self motivation, but some of it just coudn't be helped. So here we go Santa (or whom ever is reading), I'm confessing all of my terrible and naughty pregnancy sins:

• Drink regular coffee (every now and then)


• Ate more tuna than I should


• Don't drink enough water


• Don't eat enough vegetables or fruit


• Had meat that wasn't 100% well done


• Don't work out


• Forgot to take my prenatals


• Hold my bladder frequently (work related)


• Don't moisturize


• Eat at very irregular times


• Devour junk food like it's going outta style


• Eat deli ham (pre-packaged)


• Eaten a hot dog (random craving one day)


• Forgotten to wash my hands


• Colored my hair


• Eaten 2 medium DQ blizzards in less than 3 hours


• Do heavy lifting (again, at work)


• Blame my bad behavior on hormones


• Sleep on my back some times


• Wear heels


• Skipped breakfast fairly often


• Forgotten to eat entirely (no appetite at times)


• Take hot showers and baths

So there you have it, my dirty "rap" sheet filled with things I shouldn't have done or don't do enough of. Again, I'm fully aware of all of this (so don't judge me :P). I know I'm doing the best that I can most days and that's what counts. My baby has so far been given a clean bill of health. I'm just hoping that I haven't screwed anything up too far beyond repair. Although, since the belly has really started to pop, I've definitely started buckling down on: eating better, working out more, drinking more water, and avoiding things that are proven to be harmful (like hot baths, heavy lifting, and forgetting my prenatals). I've still got 12 days until Christmas, maybe Santa will change his mind about me now that I've come clean ;).

Now that I've let you in on my little secrets, I'd like to know what you've done to put yourself on the naughty list this year???

Waiting for answers

It seems like the moment things start to look up in life, there's always got to be something to knock it back down. Friday afternoon was very rough as life just seemed to take me for a nasty ride. Looking at all of our bills and comparing it to our income, things are being cut a lot closer than I would like for them to. To top it all off, Twilight came out and I had no one to go see it with. It was a bit of a depressing day to say the least.

Saturday then rolls around and I worked another early shift from 4am to noon. After that, Bryan and I decided to hang out with some friends and we all went out to eat at Gunther Tooties before going to the movies (Bryan surprised me and asked if I'd want to go with him to see Breaking Dawn). That was a huge shock and I was excited that my day seemed to be turning around. It of course couldn't last and while we were in the middle of eating I got a phone call from my sister telling me that my mom was in the hospital. She just had surgery on Friday and I was told everything went fine so I was scared that maybe something was overlooked. They ran a multitude of tests and couldn't figure anything out. It's Monday and she's still in the hospital. Things haven't improved or changed much which scares me even more. They're very worried about the condition of her heart and might have to do surgery to put a pacemaker in. I'm falling apart at the seams and it takes everything I have to keep myself from breaking down and crying through out the day. Bryan can't stand to see me hurting like this and is practically pushing me out the door to go fly back to MN and see my mom. Every part of my heart is ready to go, but all my mind can think about is how we should be using that money towards paying bills and be responsible.

The original plan was that I wouldn't see my mom until April for when the baby comes. At this rate, if something were to happen to her before hand, I don't think I could forgive myself for putting bills before her. There would be a ton of positives to going back this weekend. I could see for myself that my mom is ok or at least spend time with her and be there for her, I could see my family for Thanksgiving, I could finally meet and hold my niece/goddaughter Ava, I could see my best friend one last time before she leaves for basic training, and I could compare bellies with my cousin who is due just before I am. There's just so many more positives to me going than not. The kicker is that there's no way that we can afford a last minute plane ticket at $350 or more. Instead, I've found a different way to travel. Hello, Greyhound! They have a military discount that I can use that will bring me to Minneapolis and back for only $209. It'll be a day of travel there and back, but I think it's worth it for the amount that we'll be saving. Wish me luck and safety!

I'm officially outnumbered!

Well, it's official, Bryan guessed it, the tech confirmed it.....WE'RE HAVING A BOY!!! We couldn't be more excited and thrilled! The tech got some great photos of the baby and reported that all of the measurements showed that he is developing right on track. It's amazing what they can all see just by rubbing a wand covered in goo over my stomach, lol! Seeing him turn and kick and move as I was feeling it was the most incredible thing ever. He officially melted my heart when I got to see his first yawn. I can only imagine how much more I'm going to love him once I finally get to hold him in my arms. With all of that said, here are some of the photos from the ultrasound!

face and arm

foot

profile

Can you believe it?!?!

So the coolest thing happened to me on Friday last week......WE FINALLY GOT INTERNET!!!!! Of course we still have to hook up the router so that I can be sitting in bed doing this instead of on the couch in the livingroom, but hey, I'll take it! It beats having to drive ten minutes to the library or Starbucks only to have people look at me funny when I've been there for 3 hours.

This week will be filled with surprises and excitement! First and foremost, we get to find out the sex of our baby tomorrow at 4:45pm. It was the only evening appointment available so that Bryan could be there too. I've decided that even though I can't be with all of our family when we find out that we can still celebrate with the friends that we do have here. I'm thinking about doing the filled cupcakes and having a few people over so that we can all find out at once. It's a bit over done, but I'm still excited for it.

The other big surprise was that my sister and brother-in-law asked me to be Ava's godmother!!! I was quite surprised and hadn't really thought about it since I'm so far away. Either way I was thrilled and of course said yes. Can you believe it? I'm a godmother! Although I know it's not much more than being an aunt, but it makes me excited to think that I'll have this extra connection to her. Hopefully it'll help make the distance not seem so hard.

And of course, the last big excitement for the week is not really a surprise at all. On Friday the first part of Breaking Dawn comes out in theaters!!!!!! Yes, it's true, I'm a twilight fan. I've taken more crap for it in the past week from Bryan than anyone should, but it still won't keep me from going and seeing the movie. I've read the books more than once and of course the movies don't quite measure up, but it's still fun to see how they can bring everything to life. So there it is, my exciting week. Hopefully, I'll be able to post a bit more often now that I'm finally connected to civilization again. Up next will be a preview of my growing belly and some fun pics of the little one! Stay tuned and have a happy Tuesday everyone!

Where has time gone??

It feels like forever since I've last posted. I know that's no big surprise, but it is just another reminder for myself that I need to slow down and take things one day at a time. For those of you who are keeping track, I'm about 17 weeks and 4 days as of today (Thursday). I have another appointment on the 12th of this month and then I get to schedule my appt. for the gender sonogram!!!! Yay! We're so excited to find out if we're going to be having a little boy or a little girl. I actually just got done starting our Babys R Us registry. It only has a few basics on there at the moment, but hopefully we'll be able to add more to it in a few weeks.

A few weeks ago, Bryan and I flew back to MN for my cousin's wedding. It's been about 2 weeks since I've been home and the homesickness is only getting worse. I can't stand being away from my family, especially now that we're expecting a little one. We both grew up being very close to our family, extended family, and close family friends. Who am I to take that away from my baby? It'll be hard no matter what happens because I really won't be happy living in Kansas the rest of my life, and he won't be happy living in MN for the rest of his. We'll have to come up with some kind of compromise. As of lately the closest I've been able to get is Lincoln, NE. Granted that's only 7 hrs away instead of 15, so if that's the best I can do I'll take it! It's only become more clear now that my sister has finally had her little bundle of joy that the want to be near my family is now more like a need. I want to see my little niece Ava grow up and experience things for the first time. I want her to know who I am when I come to visit. I want my baby to know her cousins and her aunt and uncle and grandparents and all of our family friends that had such a huge hand in raising me when I was little. It just doesn't seem fair that my baby has to miss all of these things just because Bryan wants a job that will pay a few thousand more a year. I'm sorry, but it just doesn't add up when you figure in the higher cost of living on the west coast or in a large city, compared to not getting paid as much and staying in the cheaper mid-west.

If you haven't already guessed it, I'm pretty much over living in Colorado. I mean don't get me wrong, it's a beautiful state and there's plenty to do....if you have the time and the money and the resources (which we pretty much won't have any of the above for quite some time). I can't stand the unpredictable weather! We've had snow already....TWICE! I would rather take the colder MN winters than deal with this crap for 6 months. Well I suppose, that's enough ranting for now. I hope that everyone had a safe and happy halloween this past Monday, and I can't wait to see everyone again soon. Love and miss you all!

You still alive??

It's been a little over 2 months since my last post, but I'm still alive, just very busy. My world has decided to do another 180* on me and has completely changed in the last 30 days or so. First of all, I'm now only working one job at Biglots (speaking of which I just got my first promotion yesterday!!!) I'm crazy busy since I pretty much am working full time hours. Bryan has left his job at Baker Hughs and has decided to go back to school to get his degree in airframes and power plants. Basically he'll be doing the same thing he did in the Marine Corps, working on helicopters and jets. He's loving school and doing very well so far. His first class is almost over, then it's 1 class down, 17 more to go (19 months to be exact)!

Of course some of my biggest news is that I'M PREGNANT!!!!!! As of last Sunday I was 12 weeks (or 3 months for those of you, like me, who hate counting in weeks). It was a complete surprise and after I finally got over the initial "What the hell are we gonna do" shock, we've finally started getting excited about it. The "What To Expect When You're Expecting" book has officially become my new bible, and as always, I've been seeking out great tips and pointers from my wonderful sister who is due in about a month.

Now, I have to share this with everyone because it makes me so giddy that I could just burst. I've been getting those $10 off anything coupons at Kohls about once or twice a month and I've usually ended up just throwing them away because I either forget about them and they expire, or I can't find anything that I'd want. Well not anymore! I went to Kohls last Saturday and brought my coupon with me to do some clearance shopping and see what I could find. To my luck, almost everything in the baby section was on sale! I found an adorable yellow sleep and play outfit that has little giraffe heads on the feet along with a 3 pair set of earrings. Now the total of everything had it not been on sale and without the coupon would have been $26. With my handy shopping it came out to be FREE! I was so proud of myself that I made it a challenge with my next coupon that I used this morning to get an even better deal. I have a huge hunch that I'm having a girl so I bought a 2 dress set with a diaper cover, a pair of shorts, and a set of dangly earrings. The total before the sale and my coupon was $45, I walked out of there spending a whopping .11 cents! I know it's not technically free, but hey it was dang close and I was proud of myself. I can't wait to see what I can come up with the next time I go. I plan on doing this until the baby is born and probably long after, well as long as the coupons keep coming. It's become my new favorite adventure. By the end of the year I plan to take pictures of everything that I've boughten for either free or next to nothing and post my total savings just by shopping the clearance rack and using these coupons. Wish me luck and watch me save!

New course of action

As if my life hasn't turned itself upside down and on it's head enough in the past few months, it's on decided to do it again! I've had so many life paths that have been put before me and just when I thought that I could finally choose one life has decided to choose it for me, at least for a little while. I was thinking about joining the military like I said before, but it doesn't look like that's going to be an option any time soon.

While I've been going stir crazy trying to discover my life's purpose, Bryan has found his calling once again under the blades of a helicopter...well sort of. He's decided to go back to school to get his Airframes and Powerplant license so that he can become a licensed mechanic to work on helicopters again along with jets and planes. He said that his dream job is to work for Skunks, a special division of an amazing company that's based out of California that does all of the prototype work on new helicopters and jets. His school starts in September and is 20 months long. They have a great program there where he'll get his associates degree and the Post 9/11 G.I. Bill will pay for the tuition. This means that for the next 22 months I'm going to be FREAKING OUT about how the heck we're going to make up for his lost income from his current job, especially when that job is just starting to hit busy season again. It's not like student loans are anything new to me, but I was just really hoping that we wouldn't have to worry about them for him.

Now it's my turn to be the bread winner again. I've just recently found another part time job as a Big Lots associate (real exciting huh!). I'm not sure how it's all going to work out but I'm just crossing my fingers and saying many, many prayers. Say a few for me, I can use all the help that I can get!

Life...

So much has gone on since I've last posted. First of all, I got screwed...MAJORLY! I fell victim to check fraud with one of my jobs. It was terrible and it put Bryan and I in a horrible spot financially and emotionally. We were both so stressed and it feels like it's been taking forever to get things back on track. I filed a police report and found out that another person here in Brighton was scammed the day before me! It still isn't much for the police to go on, so I'll just have to sit and wait and see if anything ever comes of it.

Bryan just recently turned 25 last week Thursday so we celebrated at home after he got off of work. We bought a little grill and some steaks and he made us dinner and then we watched a movie. He said he was looking forward to grilling, spending the day with his wife, and getting a discount on his insurance! Wow, he must be maturing in his older age ;)

He came home on Friday afternoon and told me he had a surprise for me. I was immediately a little worried since he usually doesn't do surprises. Lucky for me, my husband is amazing and gave me the best gift ever...my best friend!!! On Saturday morning a little after 9am he comes walking in the front door with Megan and Jeff following behind. I was standing in the kitchen doing the dishes in my pink bath robe. I was shocked and stunned and couldn't believe it!! I guess they had been planning this for the past 3 weeks. I can't begin to put into words how happy I was and just how much it meant for me to have her there. It'd been a little over 2 months since I last seen her. Let me just say 2 months is a VERY LONG TIME for me and her to be apart! It was very hard to let her go so shortly after she got here, but it was a great time nonetheless.

For the past 3 weeks or so I have been talking with Bryan about an option that I've been thinking about for the past 3 years. I had dismissed it so long ago because I didn't think that I would be able to do it. I didn't know if I could handle the distance or the physical requirements, but now that I've gone through leaving my friends and family and been without my husband for months at a time I'm starting to think that it's a real possibility. I'm talking about joining the military. Clearly I'm not jumping into this without thinking it completely through. I want to make sure that if I do this that I'd be doing it for all of the right reasons.

I've settled on the Navy as my branch of choice. I've watched more youtube videos, googled almost every piece of information on it that I can get ahold of, and talked to a few people who enlisted right after graduation from high school. I have a 4 year degree which means that I could enlist and go to officer candidate school and immediately start out with a pretty good pay grade and rank. It would help me immensely with paying for my student loans and the benefits are great. The bootcamp is shorter than the army or the marines. It still requires a trip to bootcamp for 9 weeks and at least 12 weeks or longer of A school (specialty training for your job in the navy). I'm not a personal fan of being away from my friends and family that much longer, but just like any other branch, the contracts are only 4 years long and the first half of your year is taken up with bootcamp and A school anyways. By the time I'd be done I'd be 26 or 27 and ready to settle down and start having kids. The deployments are 6 months long, so it wouldn't be too terrible. I could be stationed almost anywhere depending upon what I'd be doing.

The biggest thing I need is support. I can already see half of my family laughing at me for even thinking that I could do this. I'm not exactly the most in shape person or someone who has made it known that I'd been thinking about the military. Since Bryan has already gone through everything that I would be going through and so much more, he completely supports me and has agreed to relocate to where ever I get stationed. I guess it's his turn to be the civvie. Again, I'd miss a lot more birthdays and holidays, but it would be an amazing experience and it would provide me so many opportunities to continue my education and travel. I haven't talked to a recruiter yet because I'm only 95% sure that this is what I'm supposed to do and I don't want to go into this without absolute certainty. If there's one thing I've figured out in my life it's that I need and desire structure and certainty. I like having rules and guidelines to follow. Like I said, I just really need to know that my friends and family will be supportive of my decision. I think that's the little 5% that I'm missing. I guess it wouldn't really be too different if I decided to go to college for 4 years out of state or studying abroad. At this point, time will tell. Until I've made any more concrete decisions on the matter, I'm gonna end this ridiculously long blog. I love and miss you all!

What will be enough?

Most of my every day life consists of cooking, cleaning, watching movies, talking to my friends and family from back home, and staring at the vaulted ceiling of my bedroom. It's pretty boring to say the least. It gets very lonely sitting inside knowing that everyone that I want to see is at least 1,000 miles away. I never thought it would really be this hard to deal with the reality that I'll be lucky if I see them twice a year. I've decided that I can't let the miles get between friendships and seeing my loved ones. I need to make it back to MN at least once this summer, and I'm ready to use any excuse that I can think of to make that happen. Don't get me wrong, the weather and beautiful scenery definitely tops what MN can offer, but it's not the same without family. I read the fb status' of my preggo sister and wish that I could be there to watch her belly grow, or join my friends as they have a girls night filled with wine and movies, or attend graduation parties and summer bbq's. I've cried more than I like to admit over the little things like this, although I try to hide it as much as possible from Bryan. I thought that finally getting to see my husband every day and fall asleep next to him every night would be enough to make me happy. Again, don't think that I don't absolutely love those moments, but it's only enough to make me mostly happy. My hope is that if I can occupy enough of my time to distract me from these feelings of lonliness, that I can make it out here alone.

So onto the exciting news...I got a job...two actually!!! I start my first one this saturday and then my next one starts the saturday after. They're both care taker jobs, which is something that I love to do. I'm excited to finally have a reason to get out of the house and feel like I'm contributing financially to my little family of two. Here's to hoping that it'll be enough.

Edits and updates

As promised, here are some of the photos that my amazing sister and owner of Studio B Photography took while she was out here in Colorado for my birthday!

This last one is my absolute favorite, probably because the pose was my idea ;). I can't wait to get the full cd back with all of the edited images!

On a bit more exciting note, I FINALLY GOT A JOB!!!! It's only taken a month or so of searching and applying for various positions to finally get a response. It sounds like it'll be an interesting one since the woman is not American, is in a wheelchair, and will be living on her own in an apartment. I guess wish me luck that this isn't some kind of crazy scam. :S

Socialization!!!!

It's been almost a week since Brenda has left and I'm still missing her like crazy. After cleaning the house as best as I could on Saturday, Bryan and I went to the good ol' Denver Intl' Airport and picked her up. We dropped off her bags, changed clothes, and headed out West towards Boulder. It felt so amazing to have family out here with me, even though I knew it was only going to be for a short time. We walked up and down Pearl Street and eventually decided on Pasta Jay's for dinner. Oh My God is that food TO DIE FOR!!!! The servings were huge and best of all, we didn't have to wait for a table. We thought we had enough room left between the three of us to share dessert, but we were very sadly mistaken. I've found a new love, it's called Oreo cheesecake! Once we were able to roll ourselves out of there, we headed back for home to call it a night.

I was more than excited as I came running into Brenda's room and bounced on her bed to wake her and the baby up! It was my 22nd birthday and I wasn't going to waste a single minute of it. We had a good talk while still laying in bed. I even got to feel baby move!!! We then continued our conversation for the next two hours at Starbucks as we sipped on yummy coffee and ate our breakfast sandwiches. The plan for the day was to head back home, get dressed and ready, go take some wedding pictures in Arvada, then come home to eat the delicious pot roast Bryan had made and some dq cake. Bryan wasn't too thrilled about the whole picture thing, but he got over it and actually ended up enjoying it (go figure). What could be more fun then getting all dressed up and having everyone compliment you as you go around taking pictures and kissing your husband all day?! Once we got home we still had a little time to wait for the pot roast to finish, so Brenda and I went for a 4 mile walk and Bryan took a nap. It felt like old times. I was in desperate need for some girl time with my big sis and I was more than happy to deal with the crazy heat and blisters. We ate dinner shortly after getting back and watched Despicable Me for the 20th time and quickly zonked for the night. It was the best birthday a girl could ask for.

Monday started out with another coffee date at Starbucks. It was nice to be able to get out of the house so much in a short period of time. We decided to drive down to Denver to check out the 16th Street Mall. It was a great morning and the weather was perfect. It was funny to watch Bryan roll his eyes every time he had to go into a department store or a little kid store. Once the wind picked up, we took it as our cue to head over to Arvada again to attend his aunt and uncle's memorial day bbq they were having at their house. They really are the sweetest people, who also happen to have the sweetest wine cellar I've ever seen! The food was great as always, but we had to leave eventually so that Bryan could get up for his 3:30 am yard call, and Brenda could make her 6 am flight back to Minnesota.

I very much hated waking up early on Tuesday morning, knowing that everything was going to go back to the way it was. Brenda was leaving. I was in no way ready to give her back. It wasn't until she got here that I realized how much I truly missed and needed her and the rest of my friends and family back in MN. I wasn't ready to be alone again. I held it together as I dropped her off, but I bawled the second I got back to the house, knowing that no one would be there. I walked up to the guest bedroom where she'd been just an hour or so before. I know I shouldn't have been quite as emotional as I was, but I couldn't help it. I was wide awake and couldn't fall back asleep. After eventually getting like 2 hours of sleep, I realized that I needed to be around people today, badly. I called up Kathy and we spent the afternoon with the kids and Rene at the pool. I didn't think I got as much color as I did but I definitely got sun burned after only 2 hours!!! Maybe it's all in my head or maybe it was the Vitamin D from the sun, but I've felt a lot better this week mentally and physically.

This past Saturday, Bryan's crew had a family picnic out at Boyd Lake State Park up near Loveland, Co. We both had a great time and I finally met some new people to hang out with. They're of course other "Frac wives" and we got along great. The guys had a lot of left over beer so we continued the party back at Shain and Kathy's. There must have been something in that beer because every guy turned into a sap that night. They all poured out their hearts and told their most personal childhood stories. They all reminisced about the accident and their time in the USMC.

Which brings me to my latest life change. Bryan has been seriously contemplating re-enlisting in the Marine Corps. He doesn't seem to like his job what so ever. He misses his brothers and the lifestyle. His only fear is that he'll be leaving me to deal with 15 years of deployments, and the possibility that he might leave me to be a single mother if something were to ever happen. These are fears that I was lucky before to never have to worry about. I don't know what to do. He talks about it all the time, and I can see that it makes him happy. It would obviously be advantageous money wise since our housing would be paid for, but is it worth it? Part of me thinks yes, part of me thinks no. I don't want to pressure him one way or another, but I hate living day to day life wondering if he's going to quit his job because he can't take civilian life any longer. We've had a lot of talks about it, and he seems to be 75% sure that he's going to go back. This would bring us back to either California or North Carolina. Again, both would be away from family and the life we've started to make here in Colorado. It's all up in the air right now, and God only knows when this coin will land.

Well enough about the confusing part. The good news is that I had a wonderful birthday weekend, I got to socialize and meet new people, and I'm feeling good about life overall. I will have to add pictures soon since my computer isn't really liking me at the moment in time. Love and miss you all!

3 more days!!!

Once again I've taken up my usual perch at Starbucks to jack their internet. I know, I know I've really got to get that installed and soon! For now it's just a great excuse for having to drive to get really yummy coffee. It's Wednesday and I've been counting down the days for this Saturday since I left MN. My sister is coming to visit me for my birthday weekend!!!! I can't express in words how much I miss seeing everyone from back home. Today I plan on getting some cleaning done around the house and then making our itinerary for the weekend. I want to make sure that this is as much of a vacation for her as it is a great birthday weekend for me! I've got a few items already on the list, but I've definitely got more to go. Here's just a small peak at what we'll be doing over Memorial weekend:

Saturday
~Going to Pearl Street in Boulder for some shopping and an early dinner

Sunday
~Driving up to Estes Park to do some hiking and take some awesome scenic photos
~Have a picnic in the National Park
~Come home for some Dairy Queen birthday cake

Monday
~Spending the day in Denver
~Go to the Aquarium and of course more shopping


Unfortunately she has to leave early on Tuesday morning so I'm sure we'll find some Starbucks on our way back to the airport. It'll be an interesting weekend to say the least and I can't wait! :D

I've been busy...

In the past month I've: finished my internship, quit my 2 jobs, graduated from college, packed up and moved to Colorado, found a townhouse, made a trip to Kansas, set up the house, applied for jobs, updated my blog, watched about a hundred movies, and found my way around the town of Brighton. It's been pretty crazy to say the least. I'll be posting pictures soon of our new home here, but since I've been sitting at Starbucks for the past 3 hours or so, I'm thinking it's a good idea to pack it up and call it a day. Plus I've already uploaded them to facebook. I miss everyone so much and can't wait to see you again soon!

Prepare yourself, this one's gonna be a doozie!

Well now that I've officially done a terrible job at keeping up with my 30 days of truth, I've decided that I had better get a move on. I'm not about to quit on something once I've started, so here it goes:

Day 7: Someone who has made your life worth living for.

I have 2 people. The first is my wonderful, amazing, loving, frustrating, crazy husband Bryan. He's been the best thing that's happened to me in almost every way. He's my rock and I don't know what I'd do without him. The second person is my best friend Megan. She has been my other half for the past 2 1/2 years. She knows me better than anyone in the world. We have been through so much together and have helped each other through the very best and worst of times. Although there are a few more miles between us now that I've moved out to Colorado, she is still and always will be my very best girl.

Day 8: Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like shit.

The only person that I can think of off the top of my head who I really despised seeing is my old band teacher, Mr. Gustufson. He made my 7th and 8th grade band years a living nightmare. Nothing good ever came from being around that man, seriously! I was actually in a band lesson with him when the 1st plane hit on 9/11. See! Proof!

Day 9: Someone you didn't want to let go, but just drifted.

It was the end of my 6th grade year when my best friend at the time moved away because her mom re-married. We had been inseperable literally since I was a year old and she was like 6 months. We grew up next door to each other, then lived a dozen blocks away, and spent every day for the next 10 years of our lives together. We tried to call each other and hang out as much as possible, but with neither of us having our license yet, we only saw each other when she came back to visit her grandma. We still keep in contact, but we're no where near as close as we used to be. :(

Day 10: Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn't know.

My very first boyfriend is someone that I wish I had never met. Unfortunately, you never forget your first, no matter how much you try. I got into waaaay too much trouble with him, he broke my heart, and has been a nagging bug in my ear ever since. He always seems to be there when things have gone wrong with any of my relationships, hoping that he'll get a second chance. It's pretty sad actually. Although, I think he's finally gotten the hint now that I'm married.

Day 11: Something people seem to compliment you the most on.

I've been complimented on my eyes many times, especially by strangers. It's definitely my favorite feature!

Day 12: Something you never get compliments on.

I can't say I've ever gotten a compliment on my use of time management. It's one of those things that takes a lot of practice to become good at. I'd like to think I'm getting better at it, but I've got a ways to go before it would be compliment worthy.

Day 13: A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough ass days.

This is a hard one since I have such an eclectic taste in music. It's been a combination of: Rascal Flatts, No Doubt/Gwen Stefani, Barry Manilow, Red Hot Chili Peppers, and Lifehouse. I told you it was kinda random.

Day 14: A hero that has let you down.

I'm not sure I've ever really had a "hero" that's truly failed me before.  I suppose that's a good thing.

Day 15: Something or someone you couldn't live without, because you've tried living without it.

Ice Cream! Lol, I never want to have to live without it. On a more serious note, I'd have to say my husband and Megan. I've had to live without both at one point. It's the hardest thing to live each day when you feel like a part of you is missing. I'm forced to have one or the other, but I pray for the day when I can have my cake and eat it too!

Day 16: Someone or something you definitely could live without.

I could live without bills. That would be a nice change of pace. :)

Day 17: A book you've read that changed your views on something.

It's sad to say, but the Twilight series have changed a few of my views. First of all, it changed my view of what one little dream can do. It also helped to remind me to never give up on what you want, wether it's your prince charming, making it big time, or getting that dream job. It's all just waiting for me to find. I've already found my prince, now onto the next two!

Day 18: Your views on gay marriage.

I have absolutely no problem with this topic. You can't help who you love and if it happens to be someone of the same sex, then so be it. If they make you happy and you them, then what's the problem? As long as they're not forcing their ideas or opinions upon me or hitting on me then I'm just fine with it.

Day 19: What do you think of religon, or what do you think of politics?

Personally, I think that religon is something that each person choses to believe in. I believe in God and that he created the world that we all live in. He alone is the only person whose opinion of me matters. I also believe that He will come back one day (maybe or maybe not this coming Saturday), and bring me to heaven.

I don't know much about politics, but I know that I don't like them. :P

Day 20: Your views on drugs and alcohol.

I believe that alcohol is fine in moderation. I also think that pretty much all drugs are bad for you in one way or another. It doesn't mean though that they can't be beneficial in some way (such as medicinal marijuana). Things such as spice, flavored tobacco, etc. are ok, if again done in moderation.

Day 21: Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?

Simple, I forget everything that happened the hour before and immediately go to her. I don't know what I'd do without Megan, and nothing is worth staying mad at her for. I would never forgive myself if we left things on a bad note and something would happen to one of us.

Day 22: Something you wish you hadn't done in your life.

I wish I hadn't cheated. There, I've said it. I'm not perfect, no where near it actually. It happend years ago, and it isn't something that I've been proud of. It ended up hurting both of us more than I thought it would, and I wish I could take it all back.

Day 23: Something you wish you had done in your life.

There's still plenty of my life to fulfill this, but something that I wish I had done is to start saving years ago. It would make things so much easier now and in the future.

Day 24: Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs?


This one's for you MNC!
1. California Love- Dr. Dre & 2Pac (Because both of our lives changed on our first trip to Cali..and it's kind of our song)
2. I kissed a girl- Katty Perry (Another one of our inside jokes)
3. I'm Blue (da ba dee da ba di)- Eiffel 65 (Cali road trip song)
4. Far Away- Nickleback (It reminds me of you every time we're in another state)
5. S&M- Rihanna (We dance to this song every time it's on)
6. Breathe on Me- Britney Spears (All I can say is "slip n' slide" lol)
7. Groovy Little Summer Song- James Otto (You're the one who got me to love this song)


Ok so there's actually about a million songs that remind me of you, and I'll have to burn them to cds and send them to you!

Day 25: The reason you believe you're still alive today.

I've never really had a near death experience, so that could be one reason. Also because I was raised with enough common sense to know better than to put myself in certain situations that could be life threatening.

Day 26: Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so why and when?

Sadly, yes. I was young and life seemed to big and too hard for me to handle. I couldn't see any other way to make my problems go away or get better. Since that time, I have not concidered it.

Day 27: What's the best thing going for you right now?

I have a beautiful house and I'm living with my husband. That and I just recently graduated with my bachelors in Psychology!!! Finally!

Day 28: What if you were pregnant? What would you do?

I would be very shocked if I was. I know that neither myself or Bryan are ready to have children yet. We both want to spend more time living as a family of 2 and take advantage of our freedom. If I was pregnant, I would of course be happy. We would do everything we could to prepare ourselves for the new addition, and share the good news with all of our friends and family.

Day 29: Something you hope to change about yourself and why?

I want to become a more laid back person and not worry so much. I can see the wrinkles forming already! I especially stress about finances all the time. It's understandable since we're a 1 income family right now, but I take so much of it out on Bryan. I really want to get better at this, and soon!

Day 30: A letter to yourself, tell yourself everything you love about yourself.

Dear Bridget,
You are an incredibly strong woman, even if you don't know it. It's amazing to see how far you've come and how you've handled yourself through out life. You're beautiful, even on the days when you refuse to get out of your bath robe. You have an amazing family and group of friends who truely love and support you. Never forget that you have what it takes to make yourself happy. Your outgoing personality will help get you through this tough transition in a new state. You're going to be just fine, wanna know how I know...because I'm you!

Love always,
~B



There! I'm finally done! I finished and it only took me like 2 hours to write it all. These people at Starbucks must be thinking that I've taken up a perminent residence here :P

Playing catch up!

Day 3: Something you have to forgive yourself for.

I have to forgive myself for doing what's best for me. Although I don't regret 99% of the decisions that I've made in the last year or so, I still hold myself accountable and responsible for hurting so many people in the process of trying to make myself happy. I'm so thankful that I had the guts to break off my engagement and move on with my life after a 5 1/2 year relationship (with 1 1/2 years of that being engaged). To this day I still claim that that was the hardest thing that I've ever had to do. I sat there and broke his heart into pieces when he never, really, did anything wrong. Of course there were things that we disagreed on and then eventually became more of an issue than it probably would have otherwise, but he never abused me in any way, he provided most of our income so that I could go to school full time, and he did what he could to make me happy. In one conversation, I had ended what we had worked so hard on for the past 5 years. Up until this point, I had blamed myself for being selfish, for not giving him more warning or notice, and for hurting him and his family so deeply, but most of all for lying to myself. I had dilusioned myself into thinking that I was as happy as I'd ever be, that this was what real life and love looked like, and that was all there was to it. I gave up on finding my "prince charming" and instead settled for "Mr. Dependable". It wasn't right and it wasn't fair for me or anyone else involved.  If I wasn't 100% happy and in love, and I had stayed, I would have been lying to him and myself and neither of us deserved that.  I still wish for him to find happiness and love with someone who will be able to return it to him the way that it should be.

So, as of right now, I have decided that it's about damn time to forgive myself and I'm officially washing my hands clean of this guilt that I've been dragging around with me for over a year. I have nothing to be sorry for, because in the end, I'm happy and I'm sure everyone else will be too. I know my husband can vouch for that one! He may not be the epitome of "charming", but he's everything that I could have ever dreamed of and more. There is no better person out there for me than the man I call my husband. I love him with all of my heart, and I'm thankful each and every day that we found each other exactly when we did.

Day 4: Something you have to forgive someone for.

I know that I need to forgive them, but I'm not quite sure if I'm ready to. For years, each parent had vented to me and my siblings about the other parent. They had their issues just like any married couple, but I hated that they would bring us into their problems. It wasn't our fault that they didn't get what they wanted or needed from the other person, but yet, I still felt as if I was being forced to take sides whenever either of them would talk to me. For the longest time, I tried to play mediator and try to make them see why the other might be acting in the way that they were.  I felt like it was up to me to try and comfort each person and I felt deep sympathy for each. I know that I need to forgive them, and I will in time.

Day 5: Something you hope to do in your life.

There are so many things that I want to do in my life, but something that I've never really told many people is that I hope to be a match for someone. It doesn't really matter to me what I'm a match for, blood, kidney, lung, heart, marrow, because either way I know that some part of me is doing so much more for someone else.

Day 6: Something you hope that you never have to do.

One thing that I hope I never have to do is burry any of my children. I believe that this is one of those things that you never truly get over. The memory can be pushed to the back of your mind for months or even years, but it will always come back to remind you of your enormous loss eventually. It's devistating to say the least, and I pray that no one ever has to go through that kind of pain.

30 Days..

Day 2: Something that you love about yourself.
I love my love for making other people happy (if that makes any sense). I'm the type of person who loves to do things that I know will make someone smile or cheer them up on any random day, especially Monday's! It's not that I want them to make a big deal out of it or to do anything for me in return. I just simply love seeing the smile on someone else's face and knowing that I put it there. It's one of the best way's that someone can say thank you. If it were possible, I would do things like this all the time and on a bigger scale if I had the financial resources. This is one trait that I proudly get from my mother. She is exactly the same way. If she could, I know she would give her right arm and leg if someone she knew needed it. Although I don't think I'd go quite to those extremes, I would do pretty much anything for any of my friends or family.

30 Days

Day 1: Something you hate about yourself.

I hate that I get frustrated with myself very easily, and then put myself down because of it. For example, I had absolutely no clue what 3/4 of the items were on my husbands benefit coverage, and felt completely retarded after I had to have each one explained to me. I feel like these types of things are common knowledge to the majority of people, yet here I sit totally and utterly clueless. I have never had to deal with things like this before since I've only ever worked part time jobs, so I shouldn't get so worked up over it, but of course I kick myself for it anyways. On the bright side, if all else fails, there's always Google! ;-)

As you can guess, I've jumped on the band wagon and decided to do the 30 days of truth. There are a ton of variations of these things, but I thought that this one would be a good way for me to share more about myself (and procrastinate on my homework, hehe).

Bucket list

It's not very often that a movie, book, song, or even a person can change the way I feel about myself, but last night I was struck on the head with a whisk. After dinner, Megan and I had a movie night and she had been wanting to watch the movie Julie & Julia, so into the DVD player it went. For those of you who have not seen or heard of the movie, it's about two women who find joy in cooking. Maryl Streep's character, Julia, sets forth to become a professional cook and write her own French cook book. Amy Adam's character, Julie, makes every dish in Julia's cookbook within one year and then writes a blog about it. The movie is filled with punch lines and great humor, an inspirational message of hope and determination, and most of all, food! I had just eaten steak and potatoes for dinner, and yet my stomach continued to beg for more. Once the movie was over, I was struck with a huge urge to do something, anything! I wanted to climb a mountain, travel the world in a two person plane, or simply go fishing. There was so much energy and motivation building up inside that I decided to blog about it. After all of that, I've come to the conclusion that I want to start working on my list of things to do that I had begun writing last summer. Some of the items on the list seem a little random, some dangerous, a few comical, but all of them mean something to me. The list is comprised of both short term and long term goals that may take me years to complete. I consider this to be my bucket list of sorts. I'm only 21, but if I wait until I've become old and retired to start living the life I've always dreamed of, trying to cram it into 20 years...well, that's not really living at all. Here it goes:

• Swim near a shark


• Take ballroom dancing lessons


• Learn the basics in 5 languages


• Travel back to Vietnam and Cambodia


• Indulge in a good bottle of wine once a month with a friend


• Take a bubble bath once every 3 weeks


• Bait my own hook and remove my own fish from the hook when fishing


• Visit Canada


• Visit Mexico


• Open a savings account for a friend's baby and add to it every year


• Spend 10 minutes in a strip club


• Go on another long road trip


• Finish my novel


• Find 50 new ways to tell Bryan that I love him


• Cook a new recipe every week for a year


• Fly somewhere just for a day


• Go sky diving


• Learn to snowboard


• Start and Finish the 30 Day Shred IN 30 days


• Eat ice cream whenever I want


• Graduate with my bachelors degree


• Live in a different state for a full year


• Learn Spanish


• Take a multi-vitamin every day


• Learn to sew proficiently


• Have a cute and functional wardrobe that is 100% me


• Own real pearls


• Fly in a two person airplane


• Learn to rock climb


• Teach a class, any class


• Get a 3rd tattoo


• Have a near death experience


• Send someone a letter in the mail once every two weeks


• Leave a positive lasting impression on someone


• Learn to do yoga


• Go to the movies by myself


• Run the Breast Cancer 5k every year for 10 years


• Climb another mountain


• Go backpacking through a random country for a month


• Read all of Nicholas Spark's books


• Donate blood


• Go to the airport and buy a ticket to anywhere on the spot


• Learn to drive a motorcycle


• Donate money to a charity every year


• Refuse to back down on a dare (as long as it's legal)


• Never let money ruin my happiness

There are still plenty more that I'd love to do, but I'm sure this list of 45 things will give me plenty to work on until then. Living life to the fullest each and every day is something many people take for granted. I don't know when or how I'm going to die; it could be today on my way to work for all I know. No one wants to look back on their life and have a 3 clip slideshow of things that made them happy. So I have told myself that from here on, I'm going to be the happy, easy going, adventurous woman that I've always wanted to be. Sure I'll probably make a few more mistakes and break a few more bones by not being as cautious, but it'll be worth it in the end. I've got my mind made up, have you?

Back to Colorado

As you may have noticed, I'm trying to update my blog and make some changes. Unfortunately, I've come to the realization that I have absolutely no skill when it comes to html whatsoever! I guess it's all trial and error from here on out, so just go with it for now :). I've successfuly made it home from my third vacation this year! It was absolutely amazing getting to see Bryan again, and I can't wait until I'm there for good! It seems like every time I turn around another week has gone by. Living apart hasn't been easy, but these trips definitely make it a little more bearable. Megan and I flew out early Friday morning (as in we were up and leaving the house by 3:30 AM!), got to spend most of Friday with everyone just hanging out at the house. I missed my Colorado family so much, and I immediately felt right at home.

Saturday morning was spent recouperating from the night before. Bryan and I were off to meet his aunt and uncle for lunch in Arvada. We left from there to go eat in Boulder, CO, but on the way Bryan got really sick. We didn't even get a chance to sit down inside the restaurant before he was throwing up again. I was ready to take him to the hospital after he threw up 11 times in less than 3 hours!!! Somehow he made a miraculous recovery and was back to his normal self by 7pm that night! I still have no idea what made him so sick, but I'm just glad it wasn't this "super flu" that's been going around. That night we got all dressed up and spent the night in downtown Denver. We ate at the Yard House, which has officially become one of my all time favorite places to eat. I haven't been there since we Megan and I met her uncle Jeff and Denise before we left California almost exactly a year ago! After that we were planning on going to Vinyl, but it was closed for "renovations" and we went to City Hall instead. The place was huge and we had a pretty good time. Sunday= Sunday Funday! After dropping off the kids at the in-laws, we headed out to a Wildlife Reserve to see some biiiiiiiig kitties! There were lions, and tigers, and bears (and wolves), OH MY! I forget how huge these things get! It was definitely fun to see them in another setting other than from behind a glass wall at the zoo. They're absolutely beautiful animals, and it was hard to keep reminding myself that these things could easily have me for a tasty lunch if they really wanted. The urge to go cuddle with them was just too strong, especially seeing them sleep like this guy below! Speaking of lunch, we decided on Shlotzkeys (however you spell it) and as always it was amazing! That night we all layed around the livingroom and watched movies. I seen Avatar for the first time and I will have to admit that it was actually pretty good. I wouldn't mind owning it one day or seeing it in 3D.

Monday was meant to be another relaxing day, but unfortunately, Kathy's 4yr old daughter Rebecca had other plans for us. She accidentally swallowed a quarter and had to go to the hospital to make sure she was going to be ok. Luckily it didn't turn into anything more serious, but she definitely gave everyone a scare. We eventually had to say our goodbyes, one thing I have come to very strongly dislike. All we could do was look on the bright side and know that this was the last time we'd have to say goodbye like this for any extended period of time. I think if Kathy could have gotten away with it, she totally would have kidnapped us and refused any ransom. She's a sweetheart and I'm excited to get to know her better once I move out there. I think out of everyone though, Megan took it the hardest. She was not only leaving some of her favorite friends, but she was having to go back knowing that she would much rather call Colorado home than MN. We keep telling eachother that we'll have a frequent flyer friendship until she gets her butt out there :P. Now it's back to regular life, work, and school. I'm down to 30 days until I move, 36 days until I graduate (eeks!), and 68 days until our 1 year anniversary. Wow, were has the time gone! I guess it's up to me to make the most of it and see everyone as much as I can before I have to say my goodbyes to my actual family and my friends here in MN. I'm really not looking forward to that day. I've never left my family on a permanent basis and it's going to be extremely tough. I pray that God will give me strength and help me through it, because I know I'm going to need all the help I can get! Until next time, be kind to one another.

9, 52, 58, 84!

One of my favorite things to do is make a countdown chart for anything exciting that I have to wait for. I've got quite a few things on my calendar that just don't seem to be coming quite soon enough for my personal liking. It's only 9 days until Megan and I fly out to Colorado to spend time with our friends, and most importantly, I get to see my husband again!!! It's been over a month and I'm just ready for this period in our life to be done and over with.

The next exciting day that I've been looking forward to for the past 4 years is that I'm graduating from college! On May 7th, 2011 I will have a B.A. in Psychology and I minored in Communication Studies. I'm not, however, looking forward to paying back my student loans any time soon :-/.

As soon as that is all done with, I will be packing up my bags one last time to officially move out to Henderson, Colorado to live with my husband again like a normal married couple should...well, almost normal. We will be staying with some friends for a short period just so that we have time to get things together and look at a couple different places so that we can find the perfect townhouse/house to call our home. Of course this day will be bittersweet for me as I will be leaving MN, many of my friends, all of my family, and the best roommate anyone could ever ask for, Megan :'(. It's become second nature to see her every day, and having her there whenever I need her the most has been the best gift any friend could ever ask for.

The next exciting date that I have on my countdown is that in 84 short days, Bryan and I will have been married for 1 year! I can't believe it's gone so quickly. We don't have a layer of cake to eat from our wedding in Cali from last year, but I'm sure we will think of something special to do to celebrate the best year of our lives :) Unfortunately, we have decided to postpone our re-commitment ceremony that was supposed to be held the Saturday before hand due to scheduling conflicts with friends and family, but we hope to still have the event some time later this year. There will be lots to talk about in the upcoming months, but until then, I've got a paper to write so be kind to one another and have a great rest of your week!

Busy, busy, busy

Life has been busy, busy, busy as always! School is flying by with only 2 full months left until I graduate, ahhhh! Still doing my internship plus working 2 jobs almost every day of the week! The hubby started his first day of work on Monday this past week and will be in "school" learning about how to do his job without killing himself for the next two months. We'll see how his little A.D.D. mind handles that one :P

On top of everything, our re-commitment ceremony has been moved from Kansas to Colorado as of yesterday! It'll be an in-state destination wedding basically. We're still doing the dresses, flowers, ceremony, and what not, but just on a much less formal scale and in the beautiful mountains of Colorado. I still hope that everyone can make it, but if not we definitely understand. By the sounds of it, we might also have a small party (bbq style) back here in MN for those that can't make it out so that everyone can still meet Bryan and celebrate with us.

Right now I should be writing my final paper for my senior capstone which is due on Friday but I've seem to developed the worst case of writers block, EVER! I sat in the library at school for almost 4 hours and got a whopping 11 sentences written. I'm pretty frustrated with myself since I've always been a pretty good writer and can pull anything out of nothing without a problem, but tonight I got nothing. I guess the plus side to this is that I might actually get some sleep tonight :)

I was just reminded about my cousin's CF walk that's coming up in May and I'm really excited that I'll still be in MN for it and can't wait to walk with her and her team of supporters. I've done the 5k Breast Cancer run in the past in the cities and seeing so many people out for such a huge cause is the best feeling you can have! It'll be a great warm up for my lungs before I move to Colorado the weekend after :) I will update everyone again as soon as life gets a little more interesting :P but until then, be kind to one another!

Successful surprise!

(You can see the mountains from their upstairs window)

After my last visit to see Bryan didn't go quite as planned, I decided that I was going to surprise him and have a "do-over" week! As soon as I had left Kansas almost two weeks ago I was looking for cheap flights to go see him in Colorado. I've really been making my way around the U.S. lately hehe.

I plotted and schemed with our friend's wife, Kathy, in order to make sure that he wouldn't find out before she had picked me up from the airport. I walked in the door after her and found my husband sitting in the livingroom watching a movie looking very bored. It took him a bit to see me but when he did he just looked at me as if he was haulucinating. He was in disbelief for about two minutes but when he finally came to he pulled me onto his lap and just held onto me tightly. Kathy and her husband Shain noted an immediate mood change in him and was excited to see him happy again. He hates surprises but he didn't hold it against me and was just glad to have me within arms reach again.

We spent almost the entire week together. It was great to feel like one big family again being with Shain, Kathy, their 2 kids, our friend Busta, and us two. Kathy and I cooked for the whole crew and we all ate together as if we'd been doing it for the last 5 years. Monday night Bryan and I played around in the pool/ hot tub at the hotel with the kids and hung out with Shain and Kathy. It was great to relax and we had so much fun with our new Colorado family. Tuesday Bryan recieved the phone call that we'd been waiting for that his background check came back and all he needed was to do his physical and a few other technicalities before he was offered the job at BJ Services in Brighton, CO!!!!! It's an awesome job that both Shain and Busta are already working for. It is exactly what we've been praying for. From the day that he is offered the job we both have full medical, health, dental, and vision insurance, and he'll be making more in his first year than he ever did in the Marines including his BAH (housing allowance)! I can just breathe easier knowing that we're going to be taken care of and that we're going to be ok. We celebrated with the family that night, but it still hasn't really sunk in yet.

(Rebecca and Robert)

On my last day there we went to The Museum of Nature and Science in Denver. It was absolutely awesome. Bryan and I are both huge nature freaks and he was like a little kid on a playground in the space room. We also watched Underwater in 3D in the Imax theatre. I stopped breathing for a few minutes during the part on sharks. It was waaaaaay too real for my comfort level! We decided not to see absolutely everything there that day so that way we could come back later with the kids and experience even more. They'll love it and of course it'll make us (Uncle Weezy and Auntie Bridget) their favorites for sure ;) hehe.

I can't wait to go back, and in fact I've already booked my next ticket for March 25th-28th. The next time I go back I will be taking my favorite traveling buddy, Megan, with me! It'll be nice having everyone that I love and care about in one place again. Unfortunately when I move out to Colorado in May I'll be leaving all of my family behind, which will be very hard to do, but it'll make visiting home that much more exciting. Another plus is that when any of my family comes to visit me, they'll get to see the beautiful state of Colorado! It definitely beats the heck out of MN. I already miss my husband more than words can say, but I know that we've only got 3 months until we're living under the same roof again.

On a side note, I'm VERY excited for tomorrow night! My oldest cousin Teri, my sister, and I are having a girls night in the cities. The three of us are the only girls on my mom's side of the family and we don't get to see each other very often. We're going out for dinner then coming home for drinks, watching movies, and catching up on our crazy lives. I'll make sure to post pictures soon! Until then, have a great weekend everyone and don't forget to share the love.

Trips, trips, and more trips!

You'd think I'd be exhausted from all of this packing and unpacking, driving back and forth, and flying up and down...but I'm not! I think one of the best parts about living apart from my husband this first year has been that I get to fulfill my love of traveling over and over again. It's one of the best feelings in the world knowing that you get to pack your bags and leave the boring state of MN that I'm currently calling home to travel somewhere new and exciting.

Ok, so Kansas may not be the most thrill seeking state out there, but it's where my hubby was and so it was exactly where I wanted to be. I drove through the night this past week on Wednesday to go visit him for a long weekend. From the moment I walked downstairs at his parents house to wake him up I was on cloud nine. We spent the next 4 days together and although it had its ups and downs, I wouldn't have changed any of it. On Friday we drove down to Witchita to visit one of his high school buddies and go out on the town. I even got Bryan to dance with me, which if you know him he usually refuses to dance. I guess it just goes to show that a little time apart and a couple of drinks can make a man do just about anything his wife asks him to ;)

Saturday was full of surprises for me. It was our nephew's 1st birthday party so I got the chance to meet almost his entire family on his dad's side. It was great to finally put faces to names and to get to know them a little better. I also shot my first gun. It was absolutely terrifying while trying to figure out how to hold it and keeping it steady. That sucker weighed a ton!!! I finally built up enough courage to take a deep breath in and after letting it back out I squeezed the trigger. Amazingly it hardly had any kick to it at all! As soon as I had the safety back on and out of my hands I started to shake from the adrenaline. Bryan's brother then threw an arm around my shoulders and said, "Welcome to Kansas, err better yet, Welcome to the Conwell family!" After that I got to experience a true Kansas tradition, going down to Bullfrogs (a local bar) and watching the KU vs. KSU basketball game. I can't believe how dedicated these people are to a college team!!!! It was a bit overwhelming at times.

Sunday came and unfortunately that meant that I had to leave. It was difficult as always, but he also left for Colorado that same day. It was nice to know that we are one step closer to finally being together for good. It's 101 days til our long distance life is over. But Megan and I are going to visit him and some of our other friends out in Colorado in 37 days. Even better yet, I'm surprising him next week by flying out in 5 days on Sunday and then returning to MN on Thursday!!! He has no idea I'm coming but I can't wait! I love doing things like this. I'll make sure to post more pics after this next trip. Until then, in the words of one of my favorite celebrities, "be kind to one another."

Fun in the big city

You'd think that by living with your best friend that after awhile you'd get sick of seeing them every day, but it's the exact opposite with Megan and I!!! It seems like we're both waaay too busy these days and we hardly gotten to hang out and just have a girl's night since I've moved in. Well, we were both feeling a bit past due and made a date on Saturday this past weekend.

Now if you lived in St. Cloud, MN you'd understand why we felt the extreme need to drive an hour and 20 minutes to find some form of decent entertainment! I put myself in charge of deciding where to go and what to do. I took this responsibility very seriously since I knew just how much we both really needed this night out. After doing a bit of research and googling my little tush off, I came up with a few ideas that sounded like a promising evening.

It's never fun when you know everything that you're going to be doing so I made it all a surprise for her. I told her to dress warm, cute, yet comfortable. That's the only hint she was given, and she was probably about as clueless as you are as to what we were doing (unless you read ahead and cheated, then that doesn't count). Our driving directions led us to Point A: The Town Hall Brewery in Minneapolis. It's a very rustic, yet casual brewery that had a large bar area and another decent size restaurant area. The prices were very reasonable and the food was even better. We both ordered sandwiches that were waaay too big for our little stomachs to finish, and a beer/cider sampler that tasted amazing! I told her to save a little room for the next spot

Point B: Le Meridian Chambers. Out the back entrance of the building was their little winter wonderland covered in piles of fluffy snow, beautiful hanging lights, a nice big fire, and a bar made entirely out of ice! It was one of the funnest times I've ever had in the cold. The bartender was awesome and even let us take a few pics behind the bar and behind the ice sculpture off to the side. We sipped on yummy chocolate coffee flavored grey goose martinis while chatting with our neighbors around the fire. Unfortunately, dressing cute and staying warm don't always go hand-in-hand in Minnesota in the middle of JANUARY!!!! Either way, we both had a ton of fun and got to spend some much needed girls time together :)

The next day I was back in the cities to babysit for my cousin's absolutely adorable daughter, Ari. She was the best little girl anyone could ask for to care for. She is such a little ham! I got to spend some time catching up with my oldest cousin on my mom's side who I haven't seen in over 6 months! She's an amazing mom and definitely someone that I have always looked up to. Although there's about 5 or 6 years difference between us, it's nice to know that we still have some things in common other than our crazy parents! I can only hope that when things get tough, I can be as strong of a fighter in my life as she is in her's. I'll have to add pictures later, but until then, stay safe, happy, healthy, and warm in this ridiculously cold weather!!!!

What a weekend!

This past weekend was absolutely crazy! It started early on Thursday morning when I dropped Megan and Wade off at the airport for her brother's wedding in Mexico. Then did lots of errands, worked, packed for the weekend, and took care of my fur-nieces and nephews.

Friday I got up early again, worked til noon, ran some more errands, then headed to Hutch for my amazing friend's wedding. We had the rehearsal, then dinner, then had one of the other bridesmaids paint me a french manicure after everyone had left. I was hoping to get some sleep that night, but I ended up going out with my sister, brother-in-law, and some of her crazy friends to the bar and was up a lot later than expected. It was a great night, well, except for the ridiculously disgusting shot. YUCK!

Saturday I woke up feeling like death (not from the alcohol though) so I popped a few vitamin C tablets and asprin and began working on my hair. I was on a budget this weekend and I think I did a pretty good job! Only spent $20 the entire weekend for gas to get me there and back :) My hair turned out a lot better than I had expected it to. I grabbed my bags and my dress and headed out the door.....only to remember that I forgot my earings and had to turn around two miles down the road and go back to get them. I felt like I would have lost my butt if it wasn't attatched that day because later I forgot my strapless bra too! The wedding went off without a glitch, mostly, and Nicole was the most beautiful bride! Blake made all of us girls cry when he got a little teary eyed as she was walking down the isle to meet him. It was the sweetest thing I'd ever seen from him. They're one couple that were truly made for each other. I love them both so much and I wish nothing but the best for them in the future together. The weather was nice (for January) the food was great, the reception was a blast, and the drinks were free! It couldn't have been any better.

On a more awkward note, both me and my ex-fiance were in the wedding party and made for an interesting night. We pretty much avoided each other the entire time and it seemed to work out great...until the reception. He had his date with him and boy was he plastered! Every time I looked around the room to find Nicole or one of the other girls, he was literally RIGHT there and was constantly making out with her. A little too much pda. It kind of made me nauseous. Luckily, I had my little brother there as my date to help me feel not so left out since Bryan wasn't able to make it. It definitely helped, but it made me miss Bryan even more.

It's now been over a month since I left Cali and I have no clue where the time has gone. On one hand, I'm so excited that the time is going fast so that way I can see him sooner. On the other hand, it means that I have that much less time to spend with my friends and family before I have to move again, and this time it'll be awhile before I get to come back. So I guess that means that I've got lots to keep myself busy with, including taking my final 2 classes for the semester so that I can GRADUATE!!!! We'll see how it goes, but until then, I hope everyone's spending as much time with the ones that really mean the most to them. :)

It's a new day, and year!

HAPPY NEW YEARS!!!

The day started out bright and sunny, but now it's freezingly cold and very windy! Dispite the weather, I've started my new year on a great note...NO HANGOVER lol! I had a great evening with some of my favorite people, the very soon to be Mr. & Mrs. Blake and Nicole Larson. They are getting married a week from today. I'm very excited to be a part of their wedding and very special day as one of her bridesmaids. It'll be an interesting wedding to say the least as one of Blakes' groomsmen is my ex-fiance :/. This will definitely be a test for one of my new years resolution: be an overall more positive person. I've been known to let things get to me, and to see the down side of situations more often than the good. I began working on changing this as of 8:30 this morning so I've got a pretty good start.

Some of my other new years resolutions are:
-become more confident
-start and maintain a regular work out schedule
-start saving as much as possible
-take better care of my body
-deal with things as they come along, don't let them build up
-find a boot to kick my butt into gear so I stop procrastinating!

Of course none of these things are exactly measurable to see if I'm actually getting anywhere with them so I've got to make them a little bit more descriptive. We'll see how they go, but I'm going to give an honest effort for each and every one of them. I'm curious as to what other people have for their new years resolutions. What did you put down for yours?